Whew - Landover Baptist is at it again, raking Tolkein's The Two Towers over the Christian coals and brimstone. Warning: This site parodies Christian excesses and is not to be taken seriously, or there will be a stoning. The very title of the film, The Two Towers, should raise suspicion among True Christians®. Secular humanists and Atheists always chide us for seeing sex where their foolish, ignorant minds cannot. But alas, it is there, raising its malignant form as usual. It's Satan's way of being childish, and it's our job to call him on it. This time around, you don't have to be a Bible Scholar or a Creation Scientist to see that The Two Towers are giant structures built to glorify and honor the aroused genitalia of two of the most powerful evil beings in the movie.