must go

Great panoramic photo of Vancouver. [huge]

photorealism

This is not what it may appear to be.

It was a beautiful day Saturday

putting my English degree to work

Somehow I got diverted to a site entitled "Weird Things You Probably Never Knew," which was filled with various factoids I've seen before in countless emails over the years, all of which I have immediately disregarded as being "Weird Things That Probably Aren't True." But because the site was filled with all sorts of groovy vintage pre-1998 html, I couldn't help but wonder why someone had gone to all that trouble to create a website promoting such inane fabrications. I won't bother you with a link (don't waste your time), but I will provide a few of the lies things you probably never knew.

Butterflies taste with their feet. (Okay, maybe)

In ten minutes, a hurricane releases more energy than all the world's nuclear weapons combined. (Doubt it. How big a hurricane? How many nuclear weapons are we talking about here?)

TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters of only one row of the keyboard. (Clever, but I bet someone could come up with a longer word in about ten minutes.)

On average, 100 people choke to death on ballpoint pens each year. (As Mark Twain said, "There are three types of lies: lies, damn lies, and statistics.")

Thirty-five percent of people who use personal ads for dating are already married. (And I'm sure you know this because these people are so open and honest about their infidelity.)

Elephants are the only animals that can't jump. (Define 'jump.' What about a whale?)

It's possible to lead a cow upstairs...but not downstairs. (Perhaps, if they were steep.)

Women blink twice as much a men. (Blinking is a physical necessity, so I can't see why women would need to work twice as hard to keep their eyes moist.)

A snail can sleep for three years. ("Can"? As if by choice? Implausible, but possible I guess.)

No word in the English language rhymes with the word "month." (That depends on how severe your lisp is.)

The average lifespan of a major league baseball is seven pitches. (Okay, I can see that.)

The electric chair was invented by a dentist. (This a flat out lie. An excerpt from wikipedia on "electric chair": The first practical electric chair was invented by Harold P. Brown. Brown was an employee of Thomas Edison's, hired for the purpose of researching electrocution and for the development of the electric chair. Since Brown worked for Edison, and Edison promoted Brown's work, the development of the electric chair is often erroneously credited to Edison himself.)

All polar bears are left handed. (Doubt it, but who knows. Why would an animal that walks on all fours favor one paw over another?)

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain. (I can see it.)

"Go." is the shortest complete sentence in the English language. (Clever, but it's not necessarily 'complete.' You've got all those implied subjects and objects in there.)

The cigarette lighter was invented before the match. (Doubt it. According to Wikipedia, a predecessor of the match was developed in China in 577, consisting of small sticks of pinewood impregnated with sulfur. The first modern match, sayeth Wikipedia, was invented in 1805 by K. Chancel, assistant to Professor L. J. Thénard of Paris. I couldn't find a date of progeny for the cigarette lighter, but seeing that the cigarette itself wasn't invented until after the Crimean War, 1954-1856, I doubt the cigarette lighter preceded the cigarette.)

American, on average, eat 18 acres of pizza every day. (Now this may be true. As a matter of fact, I'm getting sort of hungry.)

Savannah on Halloween

John and Christy brought their pumpkin-themed daughter by for a bit of trick-or treating a couple of weeks ago. Isn't she photogenic?

out there

Nice set of photos from Burning Man, taken from 2000 to 2005.

vandalartism

Next time you go to a hotel, you may want to check and see what's behind the art on the wall.

Responsible Spam

From: Confidence D. Riblet
Subject: engorge

Love life letting you down?

Can't SATISFY your woman?

Perhaps the two of you should sit down and discuss the issue. By opening the lines of communication, your relationship (and, not incidentally, your love life) will improve tremendously.

- - - -

From: Brent Ranch
Subject: final warning

Earn a *genuine* college degree based on taking classes!

Read books, write papers, take tests. It's hard work (except for Intro to Geology with Miller—that's a total blow-off), but you'll end up smarter and more well-rounded. Plus, you'll never again have so many opportunities to score.

Via McSweeney's

truly essential

Oh, and if you're into fractal art, you'll probably be needing a fractal art quilt pretty soon. Guaranteed to keep you warm during those long winter nights spent in the supercomputer lab at MIT crunching numbers.

essential

Now that you've got an iPod you'll probably be needing a large chunk of rock to keep it in.

subtle

I have been remiss

Wow, I apologize, everybody. It’s been almost a month since I last posted. But it wasn’t my fault, I swear. You see, I was abducted by the Amish and have been living in a small wooden shack in Bellefontaine, Ohio for the past three weeks with no electricity or plumbing. In between my chores, which consisted of milking the cows, feeding the chickens and extracting tree stumps from a ten-acre field with a mule-driven plow, I tried to post to the blog by carrier pigeon. It failed miserably. I was trying to upload some digital photos of my shack but the pigeon apparently didn’t understand where to plug in the USB cable or something. Then I tried writing out a blog entry on parchment with my new quill pen and sending it to Blogger, but nothing ever happened (it must have been intelligible because I was writing at night by oil lamp). Finally, I tried to construct a computer out of maple, square nails, parrafin and twine, but my hard drive would only hold one byte of information and crashed even before I got the thing turned on. Lemme tell you, blogging’s not easy on the commune. And to be honest, I didn’t think folks would be much interested in reading:

“Oct 23, 2005: Today I worked hard, ate some bread and went to sleep on the cot.”
“Oct 24, 2005: Today I worked hard, ate some bread and went to sleep on the cot.”
“Oct 25, 2005: Today I worked hard, ate some bread and went to sleep on the cot.”
“Oct 26, 2005: Today I worked hard, ate some bread and went to sleep on the cot.”

You get the idea. So please accept my apologies and keep in mind that I’m totally blameless here. In fact, in order to post this very message, I had to disguise myself as an Amish girl (luckily no one hits on Amish girls) and go to town for some “shopping,” and while the elders who accompanied me were out back haggling over the price of a cord of wood, I bolted. After a couple of hitch-hike rides from some very confused drivers, I made it back into Ada just before the computer lab closed. Well, actually it was closed and I had to break into the building and almost got arrested, but whatever. The point is, I’m back and you should be happy. Actually you probably owe me some money. I take personal checks and cash only—no credit cards, please.

Oh, and the other reason I haven’t posted for almost a month is that nothing of interest has occurred on the internet or in the real world. None, nada, zippo. Not one event of any communicable interest has happened anywhere. You didn’t miss anything. These aren’t the droids you’re looking for.

Finally, on a slightly more realistic note, I’m happy to announce the creation of a new website I created for Mary Pat and I: www.marypatandmcdowellswedding.com. As you can see from the title, it’s got everything you need to know about our upcoming nuptials. Please do stop in and say howdy.

Sooo I’m back and happy and it is a new day, full of light. I’m so glad you could make it.

yes

Folks, I'm proud to announce that Mary Pat and I are engaged! We took a dinner cruise along the Chicago shore last night and when I popped the question she said yes, thankfully. We'll be in the city until Saturday hanging out with MP's cousins and seeing the town, so I'll write more when we get home.

I am a happy man.

Scizzle

DSC02228
Originally uploaded by mcdowell.

Interesting term

Herostratic fame

judging a record by its grooves

Interesting story about vinyl vision, the ability to see groove patterns in vinyl recordings and correctly identify musical recordings without the benefit of identifying labels.

get your fix

If you're trying to quit smoking, and you really like lotion, you may want to try some Nicogel. Just give it a couple of pumps, rub the Nicogel into your skin and you'll soon get a cigarette-sized dose of nicotine.

from McSweeney's

Doctor Doom for Homecoming King.

oh dear

You may be inadvertently infringing on someone's music rights every time you dial a telephone number. You should complete a license agreement as soon as possible.

welcome to the future

Apparently the beginning of Christ's millenium is supposed to happen on Tuesday. According to Tom Stewart in his book 1998: Year of the Apocalypse, the Rapture was to take place on May 31, 1998, and the Parousia on October 13 or 18, 2005. Look busy, folks.

um

 

wireless electricity?

Splashpower Ltd. has developed a wireless charging system that uses electromagnetic induction to accomplish wireless charging of devices.

Tragedy during the French civil war

cameratoss

Set your camera on long exposure, and throw it in the air. See more pictures here.

quotes of the day

"Whatever’s clever is totally whatever."

--Upright Citizens Brigade, episode 109

"I have tried to be good. Judge me as you will."

--Jedediah Purdy, at the age of 8, in a letter to Santa Claus

"Everything is both."

--Someone's 5 year old nephew

nice

This image was taken on October 11, 2005 and received on Earth October 12, 2005. The camera was pointing toward Dione at approximately 38,352 kilometers away, and the image was taken using the CL1 and IR1 filters. This image has not been validated or calibrated. A validated/calibrated image will be archived with the NASA Planetary Data System in 2006.

(link)

Finally, a mine-proof truck for our soldiers

The Wired story.

Variations on a Theme by William Carlos Williams

by Kenneth Koch

1
I chopped down the house that you had been saving to live in next summer.
I am sorry, but it was morning, and I had nothing to do
and its wooden beams were so inviting.

2
We laughed at the hollyhocks together
and then I sprayed them with lye.
Forgive me. I simply do not know what I am doing.

3
I gave away the money that you had been saving to live on
for the next ten years.
The man who asked for it was shabby
and the firm March wind on the porch was so juicy and cold.

4
Last evening we went dancing and I broke your leg.
Forgive me. I was clumsy and
I wanted you here in the wards, where I am the doctor!


(this is a great parody of this.)

fyi

this guy is good

the story.