simmer down, kids

The Drudge Report has an early transcript of the recent showdown between Michael Moore and Bill O'Reilly on Fox News. Wow.

That's no moon

Space voyager satellite Cassini finds Death Star

good times

Well, I just got back from a delightful lunch with Alabama Supreme Court Justice Champ Lyons. One of the partners here at the firm is friends with a lot of the political figures around town, and he arranged for the other intern, Henry, and myself to have a chance to talk with Judge Lyons over fajitas at the Capital City Club. The Capital City Club is a rather swanky restaurant located on the very top floor of the highest building downtown, with great panoramic views of the surrounding countryside, so we were dining in high style. I thought it went great. Henry and I peppered him with questions law students are supposed to ask, and he graciously indulged our ignorance, telling several very funny stories along the way. The best was how one time an attorney began his argument before the Supreme Court like this:

“Good morning, Chief Justice, honorable justices. May it please the court, my name is Jeff Smith and I represent the appellant. GOD**MMIT, YOU SON OF A B**TCH!!”

[The entire courtroom was shocked. Several moments of stunned silence went by, with the judges and witnesses all staring aghast at the lawyer.]

“Your honors, those were the last words my client ever spoke….”

I loved it. We were all laughing. In addition to being very, very sharp, Judge Lyons has a great sense of humor and is easy to be around. It sort of changed my opinion of what Supreme Court justices are supposed to be like, especially after seeing and hearing so much about ex-justice Roy Moore and his shenanigans. At another point we were talking about airplane flights and Judge Lyons said he hated how at the end of a very turbulent flight, the pilot always says, “We’ll be on the ground in a few minutes.” The judge said, “I always feel like asking him, ‘Can you be more specific..?’”

Anyway, I’m back in the office hovering over a brief I’ve got to finish in the next few days. Needless to say, I’ll be here late tonight. I’ve only got a week and a half left here at the firm, and then it’s back up to Ohio for Round Two. Time has indeed flown.

(In case you’re interested, here’s a speech Judge Lyons gave recently on ex-judge Roy Moore and judicial activism. Good stuff.)

Aaaaargh, says I

Subvert the dominant paradigm: get tons of free music via the mp3 blog aggregator.

Google circa 1960.

Empty threats by supervillains data

via silly pie charts.

Interesting ranking of words in the English language page. Apparently the data comes from The British National Corpus, a collection of "100 million word samples of written and spoken language from a wide range of sources, designed to represent a wide cross-section of current British English, both spoken and written."
Who would have thought 'neologism' was way back at 84,482nd?

I'm sure all of you have been studying for The Definitive Middle-Earth Test. Here's a sample question to get you started:

16. Though Moria is, by rightful ownership, Dain's, Balin nonetheless referred to himself as "Lord of Moria". Helm's Deep is clearly the property of the Rohirrim, being part of lands granted to them by Gondor long years ago, yet in Return of the King p. 360 hardback Gimli declares himself "Lord of the Glittering Caves". Explain the laws and history pertaining to Dwarven property rights, and how those differed from the customs of Elves and Men. For full credit your answer must also reconcile Dwarven property laws with the generous nature of Aule, the Dwarves' creator.

As I was saying..

These conversational cheat shots are so recognizeable that even you should understand them. My favorite: "Didn't we already have this argument just before you went through the de-tox program?"

This is Henry Giles after hitting a grand slam home run for the Braves in the third inning. Details will follow. 

Here's a random picture of some rocks. 

loser

My life would attain the heights of hardcoredom if I could only Zorb to work.

checkmate

Bobby Fisher arrested in Japan, awaits extradition to U.S. I've been a fan of Bobby Fisher ever since seeing the movie, in the way that you always like to see the underdog win. He's brilliant, pure and simple. But after delving through a few articles like this one, I've come to realize what a deeply troubled man he is. Being a famous chess player has got to be one of the Supreme Ironies, sort of like being an Olympic meditator or world-class recluse. Chess defies hype and stardom. Yet Fisher is truly a great player, and the conflicting roles have undoubtedly put him somewhere unique. I just think the U.S. officials need to let the guy be. How can you condemn a man who could understand an article like this?


Update: think chess is hard? Try this.

Some new posts from Writings on the Stall, a collection of found ruminations inscribed on bathroom walls:

Downtown Library
Gainesville, Florida USA 32601
Men's restroom, 1st floor

JESUS CLONES YOU

Concordia University
Buetow Music Building
St. Paul, Minnesota USA 55104
Women's restroom, 1st floor

i love brian!

And below this was..

apparently not enough to keep from defacing a bathroom stall.

Jackpot
Raleigh, North Carolina USA 27606
Women's restroom, 1st floor

A kiss is two questions answered at once.

Litchfield Middle School
Litchfield, New Hampshire USA 03052
Men's restroom, only floor

Mike was here.

And below it...

No I wasn't.

update

Things are pretty hunky-dork down here in Montgomery. I love my job, and it's nice being home for a while. Last week I had lunch with Troy King, the Attorney General of Alabama. Next week I'm supposed to sup with Alabama Supreme Court Chief Justice Drayton Nabors, who was recently chosen to replace ousted controversialist Roy Moore. Life is good. It's hot as the dickens down here and I'm not fishing near as much as the doctor said I should, but I'm getting by. The following is proof I do in fact have a job, lest anyone accuse me (god forbid) of hyperbole:

Cold chillin' at my workstation.

The fountain at Court Square, right outside my office.

The law offices of Balch & Bingham.

The telegram which started the War of Northern Aggression was sent from the building I work in.

View of the library from my desk.

Looking up Dexter Avenue towards the Alabama state capital from the fountain.

I'm sure all the loitering violators are glad they aren't going to be prosecuted..

Save the Shakespeare Festival

"You only have until July 31 to reserve your Alabama Shakespeare Festival redesigned distinctive license plate. Simply go to your county license plate issuing official’s office and fill out a “Commitment to Purchase” application and pay the $50 fee. ASF gets $47 from each and the plates help spread the word about the theatre you love so much. It’s worth the little bit of extra effort to keep this avenue of support for ASF! We must have 235 “Commitments to Purchase” before July 31, 2004 in order to keep this license plate available, so get out there and get one today!"

Festivus!

Have you ever had a phone face-off? Ever met a ribbon bully? Find yourself telling people "No soup for you"? For Seinfeld fans out there who want to be hip on the lingo, check out the Seinfeld Glossary. Pretty funny stuff. By the way, Seinfeld is coming out on DVD this November.

burning and looting

Recent scary post from The Bibiovixen:

Fire department bars book-burning

CEDAR RAPIDS, Iowa (AP) -- A church's plan for an old-fashioned book-burning has been thwarted by city and county fire codes.

Preachers and congregations throughout American history have built bonfires and tossed in books and other materials they believed offended God.

The Rev. Scott Breedlove, pastor of The Jesus Church, wanted to rekindle that tradition in a July 28 ceremony where books, CDs, videos and clothing would have been thrown into the flames.

Not so fast, city officials said.

"We don't want a situation where people are burning rubbish as a recreational fire," said Brad Brenneman, the fire department's district chief.

Linn County won't go for a fire outside city limits, either.

Officials said the county's air quality division prohibits the transporting of materials from the city to the county for burning.

Breedlove said a city fire inspector suggested shredding the offending material, but Breedlove said that wouldn't seem biblical.

"I joked with the guy that St. Paul never had to worry about fire codes," Breedlove said.

The new plan calls for members of the church to throw materials into garbage cans and then light candles to symbolically "burn" the material.

Coalition: Vast Majority Of Iraqis Still Alive

'Soloman'

"The storm didn't roll in; there was no rolling involved. It slid, an avalanche tied to an oil slick, very quickly.

By the time Solomon realizes he shouldn't be out in the beech copse, it's too late. Later, he might recall that the bolt didn't so much strike from heaven as it did leap from the earth, or he might not. The impact is about a hundred and fifty feet away. The thunder is tangible as brick. It picks him up, carries him and deposits him in a vague and pleasant dream, where friendly llamas help him stomp plums into wine."

Anacrusis: fiction for the attention-deprived

right

No, I didn't steal these vegetables from the dumpster, man. I'm a Freegan.

Be it thy course to busy giddy minds

In lieu of an interesting post, as I haven't the time, let me suggest perusing the 1913 Webster's Unabridged Dictionary.

Whoops

hmm

How can this be true? Any suggestions?

Warning: reading this may cause you to lose your job

So, how many of the world's top 100 wonders have you seen? Must . . . resist . . . urge . . . to . . . buy . . . airline . . . . ticket . .

on a brighter note

Glen! Glen, Glen, Glen!

R.I.P.
Dylan and Melissa
7/1/02

And honoured among foxes and pheasants by the gay house
Under the new made clouds and happy as the heart was long,
In the sun born over and over,
I ran my heedless ways,
My wishes raced through the house high hay
And nothing I cared, at my sky blue trades, that time allows
In all his tuneful turning so few and such morning songs
Before the children green and golden
Follow him out of grace.

Nothing I cared, in the lamb white days, that time would take me
Up to the swallow thronged loft by the shadow of my hand,
In the moon that is always rising,
Nor that riding to sleep
I should hear him fly with the high fields
And wake to the farm forever fled from the childless land.
Oh as I was young and easy in the mercy of his means,
Time held me green and dying
Though I sang in my chains like the sea.

Dylan Thomas

Week One

And the verdict is: I love my job. I just finished up my first week here at Balch and Bingham, and I can't believe how much better than law school this is. I'm just an intern, so my duties are minimal, but it just feels good to be working on things that actually matter to a client. Do I really have to do two more years of school? Can't I just pick everything up as I go along?

<---wakes up

Anyway, this week I've been researching Internet and e-mail privacy issues in the workplace, and let me tell you--nothing's private. It's almost scary how little control we have over who sees what we communicate over the Web. The only sure way to keep anything secret is to be boring. The present site provides a supreme example.

Well, 'tis Friday and I'm off to Pensacola with Dad and Caroline for a weekend of seafood and sunburn. Happy Fourth, folks. Remember: point the firework away from you. Let's avoid any personal injury claims, why don't we?

ooh . . . ahh

Hurry and get the new eBay credit card! Get one "Anything Point" toward any eBay purchase for every dollar you charge on the card! Just imagine the rewards!

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